Failure is often described as the key to success. Yet so many of us avoid it, hide from it, or beat ourselves up when it happens. Why does it sting so much?

Looking back, I can see how failed job interviews, exams, games, and even relationships were some of my most important teachers. Those moments pushed me away from paths I didn’t want and opened doors to the ones I did. At the time, it felt like the world was ending. But in hindsight, failure was growth in disguise.

I see the same pattern with many of my coaching clients. They struggle internally—and sometimes externally—because of the fear of getting it wrong. That fear often leads to inaction, missed opportunities, and unnecessary self-criticism.

The key to breaking this cycle is reframing failure. Instead of viewing it as an ending, see it as data. As feedback. As a signal. When we use mistakes as lessons, we move forward. When we fail and blame—whether it’s others, the environment, or the equipment—we miss the opportunity to stop, reflect, and grow.

This shift is especially important in leadership. Managers, parents, and coaches often unintentionally create environments where mistakes are punished rather than explored. When teams, families, or athletes don’t feel they have permission to fail, they also lose the chance to learn. The best leaders create cultures where people can experiment, fall short, and rise stronger. You don’t win and lose. You win and learn.

The Leadership Lesson

For managers, this mindset is essential. Strong leadership training equips managers with the skills to build psychologically safe environments where employees can take risks, innovate, and grow. Coaching and development programs that normalize learning through failure set the foundation for healthier, more resilient workplaces.

When managers embrace failure as feedback, they model growth for their teams. That’s when performance improves, engagement increases, and innovation thrives.

At Plum Leadership Group, our manager training and coaching programs are designed to build leaders who understand this balance—leaders who create environments where people are not afraid to try, stumble, and ultimately succeed.

Closing thought:

The next time you or your team face a setback, ask: what is this teaching us? The answer may be the most important step toward your future success.